Moving on from a relationship can be scary. Realizing you need to move on while you’re still in a relationship can be even scarier. We live in a society where we have been taught that our relationship status defines us. We, as females, have been taught that we have a biological clock and that we better hurry up and get married before our time runs out. Because of this, we rush into relationships, forcing ourselves to have feelings for someone even if we don’t. Because of this, we stay in relationships even if we know we shouldn’t, even if it’s bad for us. We become terrified of being single and make up a list of excuses to stay in these relationships just so that we don’t have to face the reality of being single.
“My family really likes him/her, they’ll be upset if we break up.”
“I don’t want to have to explain why we broke up to everyone I know.”
“Maybe I can learn to love them.”
“I won’t have any friends if we break up.”
“I’ll actually have to socialize with new people.”
“I’ll never find someone else who will love me.”
We tell ourselves these things because we decide that being in an unhappy relationship is better than being single. At least if you’re in a relationship you can be unhappy with someone else.
You can see how wrong that logic is, right?
All of these excuses are keeping us from living our best lives. They’re preventing us from being truly happy. And all of these excuses are just that. Excuses.
The truth of the matter is that sometimes we need to let go of relationships. We need to let go of the relationships that are doing more harm than good. We need to let go of the relationships that are going nowhere. We need to let go, and move on.
We hold on to things for as long as we can, but there comes a point where you can no longer hold on and you have to let go. You can only make up so many excuses before you are forced to face reality and come to terms with the truth.
Holding on to something that is going nowhere hurts, but we tell ourselves that ending things and moving on will hurt more. And maybe it will, but in the long run it makes us so much happier.
The sooner you face the truth, the easier it will be. The longer you hold on, the harder it gets.
I’m not going to lie and try and sugarcoat it. Breakups suck. Having to move on sucks. But after a while, you’ll feel so much better. You’ll start to realize that all of the excuses you made to prevent yourself from moving on were ridiculous. You’ll realize that it’s possible to be happy on your own. You’ll realize that there’s so much more out there for you than you thought.
Moving on sucks. Break ups suck. But they can help you find true happiness and that doesn’t suck.
So, dear reader, if you find yourself making up excuses to not move on from a relationship, maybe it’s time to face the facts, put on your big kid panties and move on. I promise you will feel so much better. Maybe not at first, but eventually.